Tag Archives: relationships

How To USE People!

In this day and age the importance of building relationships is more important than ever.  As more and more people are becoming entrepreneurs the need to partner with individuals increases. Linking yourself and your brand to others can be a key in whether or not your business succeeds or fails. Or maybe you don’t necessarily want to partner with them but you want to make an inquiry to get some wisdom and direction. Better yet this particular individual has tons of followers or connections and you just need them to give you a SHARE on Facebook, or a reTWEET on Twitter, that shouldn’t be too much trouble. As innocent as that request or expectation may seem there are appropriate and inappropriate ways to connect with individuals to make these request known.

 

Two businessmen smiling and shaking hands. Shot in studio over white.

Here are 4 keys to USING people….

 

  1. Don’t be so aggressive– Aggression is a key characteristic for most entrepreneurs which helps them to be effective in what they do. Taking charge, taking risk and being pushy helps them achieve plenty of their goals. However when trying to build relationships and connecting with new individuals being too aggressive can be a major no-no. Remember most of the people that you are trying to reach are business owners like yourself. Aggression can be taken as rude, which is a characteristic most people do not want to deal with.
  2. Don’t be selfish– I have people that I have never met  in person (only social media) or have just recently met, ask me:  How did I get on ABC? How did you get in Black Enterprise? How do you get a vendors license? How do you get your 501c3? Now I am all for sharing information and helping people to make solid connections and build relationships. However, I am not for people selfishly taking everything they can from me and not reciprocating the effort. Before I generally ask someone for their information I make sure that I am prepared to do the same. In no bank can you make withdrawals without first making some deposits!
  3. Don’t be a bug-If you have reached out to someone and they said they would get back to you, give them that opportunity. No one likes a person constantly bugging them about anything. Give them some space. If they haven’t gotten back to you after the initial contact,  reach out at a later time, (as sometimes people forget) and say I am just following up on our previous email. That is it, if they still don’t respond, then drop it and move on to someone else.
  4. Nurture the connection–If I give someone some excellent information or solid connection and I never hear anything at all from that person again then that speaks volumes about their motive. When people assist me I make sure to let them know that I truly appreciated it. Hey, Thanks for that information, it was really great and helped me alot. That makes a world of difference. Also later on I would follow up and ask them how they are doing? It is small talk but people remember little things like that.                                                                                                                                                                             It is nothing wrong with using people if you use them the right way. However it is everything wrong with abusing people. Use these keys to make connections and to build solid relationships and grow your brand!

CAN YOU RELATE TO YOUR RELATIONSHIPS?

 

Black_Profesionals-angry

 

This is an interesting question that I have to ask because I found that a lot of people really can not. In this impersonal social media and email era, the skill of dealing with humans is being lost in a lot of ways.

Now don’t get me wrong, I am a HUGE social media junkie, I also prefer email and text over speaking on the phone as well, however I still know the importance and skill it takes to deal with people face to face and one on one. Seems like a contradiction but it really isn’t. I believe to be truly successful in today’s world you must be able to be efficient at both.

How many times have you received horrible customer service from a store or business? How many supervisors do you know that know their job but have zero people skills? Or How many people do you know that can only think about themselves? They want you to help them, support them, come to their event,  but don’t even for a second think about reciprocating for you. Yes, true people skills really seems to be lacking today. More importantly the people guilty of these actions seem totally oblivious to their actions. They are the same ones going to social media to say how crazy everyone else is!

building-relationships

Despite this deterioration, don’t allow this to deter you from still displaying your excellent people skills and nurturing your relationships.  The  reason being, those with great people skills still seem to go further in life and have healthier relationships. But what if you are one of those people who we are talking about who walks around with a frown but  swears to everyone you are really smiling.  There are many people who are destroying critical relationships and they have no clue that they are doing it.

What do you do to repair or maintain your relationships?

  • Ask a close friend. Ask someone who will give you honest feedback.  They can tell you if you come off selfish, or inconsiderate of others. If so don’t be offended, make adjustments.
  • Speak to people how you would like to be spoken to. Sounds simple, but if we really heard how we speak to people sometimes we would be shocked. No one likes to be spoken to like a child even when they are in the wrong.
  • Look in the mirror. There are times when we know we are wrong but at the moment really don’t care because we are so focused on ourselves. Take a good look at yourself and realize when you are at fault. If you are be responsible and change your approach.

I can’t stress enough how important relationships are in  today’s society. So often we think money is our number one resource, when in actuality our number resource is people. Remember it is not always WHAT you know, but WHO you know!