Tag Archives: SOCIAL MEDIA

CAN YOU RELATE TO YOUR RELATIONSHIPS?

 

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This is an interesting question that I have to ask because I found that a lot of people really can not. In this impersonal social media and email era, the skill of dealing with humans is being lost in a lot of ways.

Now don’t get me wrong, I am a HUGE social media junkie, I also prefer email and text over speaking on the phone as well, however I still know the importance and skill it takes to deal with people face to face and one on one. Seems like a contradiction but it really isn’t. I believe to be truly successful in today’s world you must be able to be efficient at both.

How many times have you received horrible customer service from a store or business? How many supervisors do you know that know their job but have zero people skills? Or How many people do you know that can only think about themselves? They want you to help them, support them, come to their event,  but don’t even for a second think about reciprocating for you. Yes, true people skills really seems to be lacking today. More importantly the people guilty of these actions seem totally oblivious to their actions. They are the same ones going to social media to say how crazy everyone else is!

building-relationships

Despite this deterioration, don’t allow this to deter you from still displaying your excellent people skills and nurturing your relationships.  The  reason being, those with great people skills still seem to go further in life and have healthier relationships. But what if you are one of those people who we are talking about who walks around with a frown but  swears to everyone you are really smiling.  There are many people who are destroying critical relationships and they have no clue that they are doing it.

What do you do to repair or maintain your relationships?

  • Ask a close friend. Ask someone who will give you honest feedback.  They can tell you if you come off selfish, or inconsiderate of others. If so don’t be offended, make adjustments.
  • Speak to people how you would like to be spoken to. Sounds simple, but if we really heard how we speak to people sometimes we would be shocked. No one likes to be spoken to like a child even when they are in the wrong.
  • Look in the mirror. There are times when we know we are wrong but at the moment really don’t care because we are so focused on ourselves. Take a good look at yourself and realize when you are at fault. If you are be responsible and change your approach.

I can’t stress enough how important relationships are in  today’s society. So often we think money is our number one resource, when in actuality our number resource is people. Remember it is not always WHAT you know, but WHO you know!

I DON’T HAVE TIME TO DO SOCIAL MEDIA FOR MY SMALL BUSINESS

Kiev, Ukraine - August 26, 2013 - A collection of well-known social media brands printed on paper and placed on plastic signs. Include Facebook, YouTube, Twitter, Google Plus, Instagram and Tumblr logos.

So often when I come across an interesting small business I immediately run to Twitter,  Instagram or Facebook to get more information or just to make a quick connection with them. I can’t tell you how disappointing it is to find out that many of these small businesses do not have a social media presence.  I am not talking about 2 or 3 but from my studying more than 60 percent of the small businesses I came across did not have an active social media presence. Not only businesses but so many churches across the country have totally ignored this opportunity to reach the masses.

Make no mistake plenty of people are like me and would much rather link up with a business on social media before going to their website. So when business neglect to add this vital feature to their profile they are missing out on customers, exposure and more importantly income.

Now I’ve had small business owners tell me, yes I am all over social media; Facebook,  Instagram and Twitter. However, when I go to the page the profile is incomplete,  it contains an old logo and they haven’t posted anything in 24 weeks. Now to social media pros this is a no-no. This is worse than not having any accounts at all. People will not follow your accounts if they see that you are not active and will have questions about your business as a whole.

Also business owners will say, “well I don’t have the time”. They would rather function on the part of the business that they are good at, which is understandable, but not acceptable.  Being a business owner will require you to wear many different hats and some of the hats are not as comfortable as others, but all are needed. Like you would do with any other part of your business if you are not qualified to do it, you hire someone who is.

As for the churches, from the several I have contacted many have some mystery person who I could never reach who “runs” their social media department.  Again another missed opportunity.  In today’s world,  social media is a monster and must be tapped into with just as much tenacity as any other area of your business.

Social media was so instrumental to me in running  Www.thatsuitsyou.org, (a non-profit where we provide suits to men for work), I was able to connect with businesses like BLACK ENTERPRISE,  ABC, CBS, MLB and individuals like BILL RITTER, DON CHAMPION and TOM LLAMAS. Also everyday business and individuals from all over the country. I was actually on the cover of a magazine in Hawaii simply based on social media. So I know the value that it can bring. As a result I began managing social media accounts for individuals and churches who realized they needed one but didnt know how to manage one or just didnt have the time to do it.

Whatever you reason may have been for not having a strong social media presence prior to reading this, make every effort to change that as you could be costing yourself customers and money by being ANTI SOCIAL!!!

WHO IS TODAY’S BLACK WOMAN?

Who is todays black woman?

eyeshadow-for-black-women-2

If I was to just answer this question simply based on what I see and hear on the internet and television that would not be to pretty. Those outlets do not do the black woman justice. I know I can hear people yelling, “Those are just shows”, “let them live”, or “we need all the roles we can get”. Trust me I understand all of that but I believe the impact that these images have are tremendously impacting young ladies and women of color all over in such a negative way.

Reality is imitating fantasy all the time. If Olivia Pope wears an outfit, the sales on that outfit goes up. If Mary Jane has a nice bag, the sale on the bag goes up. If someone has sex in the bathroom using a shower pole, the sale on that item goes off the charts. Life is definitely imitating art, good and bad. This is only part of it, when there are fights among black women on these shows, or cheating or any other negative behavior social media will have the same activity from ladies young and old. Now the stars on these shows are definitely benefitting and being paid handsomely for it, which some of them should, and why not since the companies are making tremendous money off of it. But at what cost? I asked a question on social media this week…Who is the most positive African American woman on television today? People were hard pressed to give me an answer. So many of the roles on TV are not roles that young girls should imitate. I hear you saying why not? Olivia is hugely successful, intelligent, savvy, well dressed, and beautiful. She is a leader, an entrepreneur, and very determined. Mary Jane is a business woman, gorgeous, stylish, fit, highly motivated and very successful. Cookie, although a little aggressive, is determined, resourceful, stylish, focused and intelligent. Aren’t these qualities that we want our daughters to have? I would have to agree with you there. However they all share a common problem, men. For some reason they all have men issues. As I do a lot of networking and meeting different woman a lot of them say they have the same issues as well. They are becoming more successful in business but not so successful in love. I believe that is a reason why these shows are so successful because people can relate to them so well.

Another big part of it is that men have done a big number on so many woman. They have called them all kinds of names (THOT, HOE, BITCH, etc.), treated them all kinds of ways. You even have videos now going around where so called men are fighting woman and posting it. Everyone knows black women outnumber black men, and men use that to their advantage. So if you have a young girl who does not have high self-esteem because her father, or parents didn’t fill her with confidence growing up. Now she begins to be called derogatory names and treated horribly by young boys and men, and she is watching negative images of black women on TV, she becomes a prime victim to men all over to be used and abused.

Little Girl

I think of my mother, who used to work, come home, cook, clean, make 3 kids do their homework and put us to bed, then get ready for the next day. My father didn’t get home to midnight from work so she had her work cut out for her. I never heard her complain or say this is too much. It might have been but she handled it like a trooper. My grandmother did it with 3 kids the same way, and my great-grandmother did it for 8 kids, just the same. Now women have never had it easy in society, especially not African American woman. But they always seemed to persevere and shine through with incredible strength and grace. Somehow and someway they made things happen, came through when it seemed impossible and all with a smile. This is what I think of when I think of Black women. Not what I see on television or the internet.

So who is todays black woman? I know she is definitely not a THOT, whore or a bitch. I believe she is a strong woman who loves her family. I believe she runs her business or employment highly effectively. I believe she dresses as a queen and keeps her home in order. I believe she is not defined but TV roles, or social media but has high self-esteem and allows God to define her. Whether in a relationship or not she is confident in her abilities and talents. Who is todays Black Woman? I believe she is a true Queen. So no matter what society says, dust of your crown and straighten it out on your head. Just read Proverbs 31, I married one.

 

@THATSUITSYOU @PKSPITCH